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Council OKs Court-Ordered ‘Time-Outs’

| Opinion | May 10, 2018

After a rather raucous council meeting concerning Santa Clarita’s stance on sanctuary cities, Mayor Laurene Weste quickly discovered the need for order in the chamber. Her solution: time-outs designed for grown adults.

At future council meetings, Weste reserves the right to “put naughty men and women in the corner until they learn how to behave.” If public participation gets out of hand, offenders will be escorted by sheriff’s deputy to the corner of the room until they have thought about what they’ve done.

“We will not have name-calling in public,” Bob Kellar said. “We reserve that kind of talk for the grown-ups in my cigar room.”

This initiative will take much-needed sheriffs off of the streets and put them in the council chambers where they will kindly ask the public to put signs away – over and over again.

“Our sheriffs have been training vigorously to perfect stern looks and ear-grabbing techniques,” Weste said. “I’m excited to see it carried out at our next meeting when we, as a city, take a stance on the war in Iraq.”

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About Sarah

Sarah is a student at College of the Canyons and likes to take long walks on the beach. She loves everything jazz, and is aware of every kind of cheese known to man. There's no such thing as a perfect woman, but if there were, she is second to last - and she'll take it.

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