Doug’s Rants THIS WEEK!

| Doug's Rants | March 22, 2012

Random Rants

When calling a business or medical facility and getting their recorded greeting, just once I’d like to hear, “No need to listen carefully, as our menu options have not changed for a long time.”  *   Is it wrong to teach our young sons to just go to the bathroom in the backyard while they are playing out there (#1, that is)? After all, aren’t we supposed to conserve water?   *   Say what you want about Newt Gingrich, but I admire the way he challenges news hosts when they ask him questions slanted to create controversy. He fires right back at them with intensity, calling them out on their dumb questions. You don’t hear any of the other candidates showing that kind of spunk. Not sure whom I’m voting for, but I find Newt’s response refreshing.  *   March Madness is in full swing and if you really think about it, in the scheme of life, what is so important about one group of college students beating another in a game?  At the same time as you watch these athletes who have worked so hard, their fans and families agonizing or rejoicing over every aspect of the game, you realize it is important to an awful lot of people, including me. I often ask myself (or my wife asks me) why I get upset when my team loses? Well, I was struck recently when the camera was on the mom of a player whose team had just lost and she had tears streaming down her face because her heart broke for her son. That’s when you realize how important these games are.

Recent headlines catching my attention, along with opinionated Rants…

Area has “cool, raw weekend”:  I’ll say it was raw, especially when I’m ankle deep in cold, wind-driven rain, trying to unplug overwhelmed drains in the backyard as the water is about to seep into the house!

“21 Jump Street leaps to number 1”: I guess we really are in need of entertaining distractions if this movie is number one!

“Obama should increase domestic oil production”: Ya think?

“2012 brings new direction to Senior Center”: A wonderful and worthwhile organization!

“Kudos to Man, Woman of the Year nominees”: If I live to be 85 years old I sure hope I’m as sharp and have as much energy as last year’s Man of the Year – Harry Bell. He still drives his 40-foot RV around the country, flies his own plane and is involved in civic and charitable organizations. You go, Harry!

“Vin Scully cuts back on 2012 broadcasting schedule”:  Vinny, what ever you want to do is fine with me, as long as you keep doing some of the games. My first memory of him was when I was very young in Tucson and my grandfather would sit and listen to Dodger games most every night. Again, another amazing 80-something still going strong!

“Peyton picks Broncos”: Oh well, another disappointment for me and my Arizona Cardinals.

Favorite jokes of the week:

Because I’m a man, I do not want to visit your mother, or have your mother visit us, or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any more than I have to. Whatever you get her for mother’s day is fine with me, I don’t need to see it. But, don’t forget to buy something for my mother too.

Can an atheist get insurance against acts of God?

I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman where the self–help section was. She said, “If I told you, it would defeat the purpose.”

Favorite quotes I ran across this week:

“Have you ever noticed that anybody going slower than you is an idiot, anyone going faster is a maniac?”  (George Carlin)

“I’m not young enough to know everything yet.” (Oscar Wilde)

“Life is risky, sometimes you can die from it.” (unknown)

“I’m not afraid to die, I just don’t want to be there when it happens.” (Woody Allen)

I welcome your comments (and rants)… write me….doug@scfree.net

Doug’s Random Rants

| Doug's Rants | March 22, 2012

This is the second issue of Santa Clarita Gazette & Free Classifieds. FREE NEWS is now included here and @ SCFREE.COM. You may think to yourself, I can get free news on the Internet anyway. True, but have you heard, more and more newspapers are cutting back on news you can read online and many are now charging to be able to read their publication online. With us it’s free news and free classifieds all the time!  If it’s free…Buy it.  *  When we moved to Santa Clarita in 1997 not knowing a soul, we stumbled upon Grace Baptist Church and Pastor Tom Givens. His teaching and preaching made us feel instantly at home and while we didn’t know him well (very large church) his messages through the years were timely, inspiring and comforting. I especially remember  the Sunday after 9/11 when the church was jammed to the rafters with folks looking for answers, the message he delivered was remarkable. Sadly, Pastor Tom passed away last weekend after a long and difficult illness. *  I wish the powers at be would move the daylight savings time change back to April. I don’t think it’s safe for kids to be walking to school or bus stops in the dark. If the change went back to April, this wouldn’t be as much of a problem. *  The President says if we reduce our demand for oil the price will come down, but if we produce more oil here it won’t. When I took Econ 101 I learned about supply and demand…I guess he missed the supply part of the class.

Recent headlines catching my attention, along with opinionated Rants…

Funds lacking for new sheriff’s station: Everyone (including me) was in a tizzy about this and now we find they don’t have the money to do it anyway!

Divorce means splitting from kids, too: Know a couple going through this now. While it’s none of my business…couldn’t they tough it out for a few years until the kids get older?

Military dad joins race: Not sure if Dante Acosta can unseat Buck McKeon, but with our son heading to Afghanistan, I sure appreciate his efforts to open up communication with the government regarding our soldiers over there.   

Church hit with Graffiti: Unbelievable, words can’t express…

Incumbents for City Council: The Signal endorses Bob Kellar and Laurie Ender. The Gazette endorses Kellar and TimBen Boydston. Boydston’s perceived divisiveness would be good for council and us citizens.    

Obama visits factory: The President proposed creating a $1 billion network of manufacturing institutes and a $45 million pilot institute. I say the same thing I say to my wife when she wants to remodel the kitchen: “Where are we going to get the money?!”

 Redivisioning close: High school sport divisions to change – I say yes! Move those high powered private schools who are able to recruit athletes from anywhere to a higher division, enabling a level playing field for Santa Clarita teams, especially in the playoffs.   

Speculation rampant in desert: Peyton Manning visited the Arizona Cardinals, exploring the possibility of playing for them. As a season ticketholder for the first eight years they were in Phoenix , I say break the bank to sign him. Can you imagine him passing to Larry Fitzgerald!!     

Favorite jokes of the week:

Because I’m a man, I think what you’re wearing is fine. I thought what you were wearing five minutes ago was fine too. Either pair of shoes is fine, with or without a belt looks fine. Your hair is fine, you look fine, can we just go now?

Advantages of being a woman: We get off of sinking cruise ships first, we never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there, and we can fully assess a person just by looking at their shoes.

Favorite quotes I ran across this week.

“Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy.”(Steven Wright)

“You must first have a lot of patience to learn to have patience.” (Stanislaw J Lee)

“One of the keys to happiness is to have a poor memory.”  (Rita Mae Brown)

I welcome your comments (and rants), write me….doug@scfree.net


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